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NOURISHING RELATIONSHIPS
Many in the Sandwich Generation are facing the issues of a family in flux and are dealing with the complexity of these relationships in midlife. You may be tested by several challenges at once, - a teenager pushing limits, a student off to college, a kidult boomeranging back home, an aging parent in decline, a life partner retiring. Perhaps your family is growing as you become a step-mother, mother-in-law or grandmother, adding other relationships to the mix. It is possible to nourish both your family relationships and yourself. Here we help you do this - sharing vignettes that resonate and practical tips that are easy to incorporate into your life. Tailor the material so that it works for you. You are unique, with your own family dynamics, character strengths and personal needs. Use these articles to help you create a healthier sandwich. Aging Parents How to Shift from Daddy's Girl to Caregiver for Dad "It was painful for Tricia, as her father declined in his 80's. "Dad and I shared such fun times together when I was young - he taught me how to ride a horse, shoot a BB gun, ice skate, stand on my head. He was always so active. Last year, I had to insist that he not drive anymore. Now, seeing him shuffle around just breaks my heart." Read More How the Sandwich Generation Can Help Their Parents Create a Legacy of Meaning " As a Baby Boomer member of the Sandwich Generation, perhaps you have already had talks with your aging parents about their wills, beneficiaries, and advanced medical directives for hospital care."... Read More The Sandwich Generation and Their Parents' Tarnished Golden Years " Parents of Baby Boomers look toward their sixties, seventies and eighties as golden years, with the chance to enjoy the fruits of their labors. But what happens when those days become tarnished gold? What if nothing you or your "... Read More Male Sandwiched Boomers: A New Trend in Caregiving " With 2008 in full swing, perhaps you've already had your fill of economic and political predictions by experts and clairvoyants. However, if you happen to be a Sandwiched Boomer, the following quietly growing trend may surprise you. The results of recent studies indicate that nearly 40% "... Read More Nourishing Mom on Mothers Day " Sending flowers, candy and greeting cards are de rigueur for mom on Mother's Day but, as members of the Baby Boomer generation, we recognize that what your aging mother really wants on her special day is to feel nurtured. Ellie's mother, who had been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease, no longer "... Read More Growing Children How to Launch Your Boomerang Kidult "Now that Labor Day has come and gone, all the kids should be out of the house and back at school. But wait! What about your emerging adult child who is still living with you, his or her college degree neatly tucked away? Are you in the midst of a replay of the big screen comedy 'Failure to Launch' and not finding it quite so funny?" Read More How to Lay Low as Helicopter Parents "As your college student is settling into the dorm, are you discovering that letting go is more difficult than you imagined? Even with the pressures you feel as a member of the Sandwich Generation, are you ambivalent about cutting the apron strings?." Read More How to Love Your Kidults By Letting Go "Are you a loving but hovering parent? Parents typically are raising fewer children today and have actively pursued an only-the-best policy from infancy on. So far, the twenty-something progeny of Helicopter parents have reaped the benefits from some of these advantages." Read More Creating Special Family Vacations for the Sandwich Generation "Summertime and the living is easy" - so said George and Ira Gershwin. There's just something about the warm sun, blue skies and late evenings that makes us want to ease up, have a change of scenery and leave our day-to-day work world behind. "... Read More 6 Tips for Sandwiched Boomers Planning Summer Staycations "With the high price of gasoline, are you thinking of canceling your vacation trip? This summer more and more Sandwiched Boomers are reducing their carbon footprint by taking "staycations" with their families. Why drive to a resort when "... Read More The Obama Family and Family Values "In a recent letter to his girls, President Barack Obama wrote: "I want you to grow up in a world with no limits on your dreams and no achievements beyond your reach. .." Now that's a strong message from a father to his daughters. "... Read More How Rihanna Can Be a Positive Role Model for Teenagers "Children today are caught in the crosshairs of modern media. Technology has become their babysitter reality TV, nude photos on the Internet, bizarre videos on YouTube, seductive text messages. "... Read More Life Partners Point of View: The Male Boomer and Long-term Relationships "Both men and women are short changed when sweeping generalizations are applied to the male psyche. Men can not all be painted with broad strokes. Some comments from a poll we took may help build a more complex picture of the midlife male perspective, particularly concerning long-term relationships."... Read More Father's Day, Boomer Men and Communication "Have you bought into the commercialism of Father's Day, thinking fancy ties and expensive tools would bring you closer - only to find that you still want better communication with your Dad? Are you not satisfied with just the occasional email from your brother or text message from your son? If you're ready for more direct and open conversations with the men in your life, begin with your partner."... Read More Boomer Couples and Change: Re-examining Your Relationship "Being comfortable in a relationship feels awfully good - but functioning on automatic pilot can get you into trouble. For some couples in the Sandwich Generation, the impetus to examine their partnership comes from the different energies that each wants to invest in family, career or leisure. Don is torn between his own needs "... Read More Boomer Couples: Deepening Your Conversations about Serious Illness "As Baby Boomers continue to age, the rise in incidence of serious illness affects nearly every family - especially if you're a member of the Sandwich Generation. When you or your spouse develops cancer, heart disease, stroke or another chronic illness, it can change "... Read More Spitzer's Morality Issues "The media spotlight the past few days has been on Eliot Spitzer, the Governor of New York, and his link to the Emperor's Club VIP prostitution ring. Whether his damaging behavior is related to an inflated sense of entitlement, "... Read More Boomer Couples: 5 Tips for Fighting Fair "All couples get angry and have arguments, so know that you're not alone. But remember, when resolving conflict, to keep your words sweet - you may have to eat them. When in conflict, you can "... Read More Avoiding Infidelity: 8 Tips to Keep Partners Faithful "The news media thrive on streaming information - and gossip - about the exploits of high visibility couples. The general public has been well informed about the infidelity of John Edwards, the visits to call girls by Eliot Spitzer, "... Read More Marital Harmony despite Financial Woes "A perfect marriage would be free of financial controversy. But during this economic crisis, the reality is that couples need to learn new money management skills and face tough financial decisions "... Read More The Stock Market Meltdown and Domestic Violence Awareness Month "Lost in the headlines about the presidential election and the stock market meltdown is the fact that October is the month dedicated to controlling domestic violence. The irony is that the financial shock waves are likely to increase the prevalence of abuse "... Read More The Relationship between Madonnas Divorce and Sandwiched Boomers "As a Sandwiched Boomer with changing family responsibilities, you have the toughest of balancing acts - attending to kids, parents and personal needs while still nurturing your marriage. You may envy celebrities like Madonna "... Read More How to Achieve Family Flexibility in Times of Financial Flux "As Leo Tolstoy put it in Anna Karenina, "Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." What about other family traits? Are families who are flexible all flexible in the same way? And are rigid families each set in their own ways? "... Read More Expanding Family From Baby Boomer to Mother-in-Law: How to Play Your New Role Now that your son has popped the question, the congratulations from your friends include some advice about the wedding: "smile, shut up and wear beige." But it doesn't have to be like this."... Read More Create Meaningful Bonds with Your Grandchildren Across the Miles "Baby Boomers have jumped into the grandparent role in the same way that they engaged in other phases of their lives - with enthusiasm and active commitment. They have redefined what it means to be grandparents... Read More How Support from the Sandwich Generation Can Help Britney Spears "In any media frenzy lately, Britney Spears is at the top of the list when it comes to celebrities and controversy. What do you think - is she a puppet of the press..." Read More What You Can Learn from President Obama's Mother-in-Law "Now that Michelle Obama's mother is living in the White House, will the cruel jokes and snide remarks about mothers-in-law finally stop? Will Marian Robinson, as first mother-in-law, be able to pave the way ..." Read More Nourishing Yourself How to Nourish the Sandwich that is You "You may well be asking yourself, how can I balance caring for my parents, my children and myself? Here are some tips to help you sustain and nourish yourself. As you assume greater responsibility for your parents and maintain your role in your children's lives, enjoy the time and activities that allow you to take care of yourself."... Read More How to Inventory Your Assets for 2007 "Have you ever noticed how, at this time of year, there are lists and lists circulating? You can find a list of the 20 best films of 2006, the 10 worst dressed people, the 50 most interesting books. In addition to spending some of your spare time reading through these lists, how about taking some personal time to create your own list - of your 10 most important assets? "... Read More How to Turn a Crisis into a Challenge "When a crisis hits - the end of a marriage, the loss of a job, or the death of a loved one - it throws you into a complete tailspin. Suddenly your world is no longer safe and secure. What can you do to pick up the pieces and take the first steps toward living a full life again? "... Read More New Year's Resolutions for Sandwiched Boomers "Are you like the millions of Americans who, year after year, make New Year's resolutions that they don't keep? Have you made a vow to lose 25 pounds, exercise four times a week or save monthly for your retirement? Noble goals - but do you keep "... Read More What Oprah's Support of Obama has to do with Sandwiched Boomers "Oprahbama, the big O's, Oprah and the Obamas - sounds like a rock band on a road trip. As Oprah hit the campaign trail recently, her candidate "... Read More Politics of Change "The soaring rhetoric from presidential candidates has been about the concept of change - and the electorate is energized by the buzzword. But is the idea of change really so new? In 1944, the Republican governor of New York, Thomas E. Dewey, ran for President against three-term incumbent Franklin D. Roosevelt "... Read More Sandwiched Boomers: 7 Tips on Fighting Inertia "On almost a daily basis, as Sandwiched Boomers, you are bombarded by a variety of tasks involving aging parents and growing children. In addition, you're balancing a myriad of responsibilities at home with those that confront you at work. And that's without mentioning your ongoing commitment to staying healthy, "... Read More Boomer Women and Friendship: The Gift You Give Yourself "We can say without a doubt that intimate friendships have always been important to women. But have you noticed that they've become even more so as you face the transitions of children growing up and parents growing older? Findings from a recent MacArthur Foundation Study indicate that the emotional security and "... Read More Top Ten Self-fullness Tips for Sandwiched Women "No need to look up "self-fullness" in the dictionary - you won't find it. And it's also not likely to be in the vocabulary of women who are pulled between their careers, children, parents, spouse or even grandchildren. No matter what age women "... Read More 6 Ways to Manage Common Unhappiness "Your thoughts are mental products although they don't necessarily reflect an absolute reality. However, for you, they do represent how you feel. Some people can't help but wear their hearts on their sleeves. "... Read More 7 Stops on the Less Stress Express "Would you like to spend less time racking up emotional debt and more time receiving dividends from your 'feeling better' bank account? Research findings show that the complex demands of family and work can really get you down. "... Read More How Boomers Can Sing Rock & Roll Instead of the Blues "The new Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends survey measured dissatisfaction and pessimism in close to 2500 participants. The data indicates that Baby Boomers worry more than any other generation. And a recent study from the University of Chicago suggests that the boomer generation "... Read More 7 Lessons the Olympics Can Teach Boomers "This summer, billions of fans watched athletes from around the world compete in the Beijing Olympics. Even with political controversy and global tensions running rampant, these diverse games reflected the delicate balance between reality and entertainment. "... Read More Mothers Capture Precious Medals at the Beijing Olympics "The full range of female athletes on the 2008 Olympic teams makes it clear that age and family responsibilities are not the barriers to participation in the Games they used to be. Stories from Beijing highlight the courage and resolve of the mothers of the "... Read More The Real Face of the Olympics "The anticipation of the Bejing Olympics was palpable - and the spectacular opening ceremonies, at the impressive Bird's Nest, proved it was well worth the wait. Yet the ideals of the summer games are also well represented behind the scenes:"... Read More The Economy and Domestic Violence: What if You Are the One with a Short Fuse? "Across the United States and around the world, the effects of the financial crisis continue to spread foreclosures are widespread, banks are being taken over, stock markets are erratic, credit is frozen and bankruptcies are increasing. "... Read More Recover from Financial Panic by Investing in Yourself "The financial crisis has affected many people and involved losses on many levels jobs, income, money in the stock market, a certain comfort level, retirement funds, a sense of security, dreams for the future. And, inevitably, these feelings"... Read More Five Ways Sandwiched Boomers Can Think Positive in Tough Times "These are unprecedented times. With the breakdown of traditional financial institutions, the wildly fluctuating stock market and the 700 million dollar government bailout, Americans are confused about how to respond."... Read More 5 Steps to Gratitude Despite a Tough Economy "Even with the harsh economic news - jobless rates up and the stock market down - we can still find a lot to be grateful about, especially during the holidays. Families and friends traditionally draw together for support in times of crisis "... Read More 7 Ways to Delay Gratification in a Troubled Economy "In years of plenty, American society operated largely on the pleasure principal embracing the notion that I want what I want when I want it. Accustomed to instant gratification and a sense of entitlement, people were emotionally conditioned to have it all. "... Read More 8 Strategies to Turn Your New Year's Resolutions into Reality "Over two thousand years ago, the ancient Romans began the practice of making New Year's resolutions when they named the first month after Janus, the god of beginnings."... Read More Captain Sullenberger: Heroes and Lessons Learned "Bravery and humility - often at the heart of fairy tales are qualities that can inspire all of us to be the best that we can be. And, with the doom and gloom of the economic crisis, we were primed and about ready for a miracle. "... Read More 10 Life Lessons from The Academy Awards "Amidst the yards of fabric and the glitter of jewels, the 81st Academy Awards might seem an unlikely place for 40-somethings or sandwiched boomers to look for role models. After all, the red carpet doesn't exactly represent the clothes "... Read More How to Manage Depression Short of Having Octuplets "Nadya Suleman is a 33 year old unemployed single mother who recently gave birth to octuplets, conceived through in vitro fertilization. She grew up as an only child and had always dreamed of having a large family. "... Read More Cheer Captain Phillips and Train for Your Own Success "Americans were thankful and joyous to learn of the successful rescue of Richard Phillips, captain of the Maersk Alabama, a commercial ship bringing much-needed food and supplies to Africa. Capt. Phillips acted "... Read More Holidays How a Tribute to Veterans Can Emphasize the Value of Family "Veteran's Day gives us all an opportunity to pay tribute to people who have sacrificed to protect our freedoms over the years. As you remember the veterans of all wars, reflect on parallel ideals of honor that apply to your own relationships and work to increase the bonds of family unity"... Read More What the Sandwich Generation Brings to the Holiday Table "Are you wondering if your family dynamics has the potential for creating its own complications during the holidays? Are you ready to take the family conversation up a notch or two this year and talk more than holiday decorations? Use some of the following tips in order to create new holiday rituals."... Read More Baby Boomers and Family Holiday Stress "Is the commercialism of the holidays getting you down? How would you like to spend less time racking up credit card debt and more time putting heart into your relationships? "... Read More How The Gift of Connection Can Help Baby Boomers Reduce Holiday Stress "In your holiday daydreams, do you envision universal goals like sustaining our planet's resources and gaining energy independence - or less stress? For many Baby Boomers, this time of year tends to be exhausting rather than inspiring"... Read More Boomers and the Valentine Gift of Discourse "This Valentines Day, are you hoping that your sweetheart will write words for the love song you've been waiting to hear? Are you busy shopping for the language of love that is bound to communicate the intensity of your true emotions?"... Read More How to Create More Intimacy with Your Valentine "February is perfect for cuddling, with the cold weather and longer nights. No wonder it's known as the month for romance. But, as a member of the Sandwich Generation, does caring for your growing children and aging parents make you too tired to bring Cupid back into your intimate relationship?"... Read More How Observing Veterans Day Can Resonate for the Sandwich Generation "As the average age of men and women in the Armed Forces rises, many are a part of the Sandwich Generation, concerned about"... Read More Baby Boomers and Halloween: How to Deal with Ghosts from the Past "Although present day Halloween activities revolve around trick-or-treating and costume parties, historically masks were worn to placate the evil spirits. You may not be frightened by pumpkins ..." Read More How Sandwiched Boomers Can Give and Get the Gift of Health "Americans are busy spending well over $26 billion on gift cards this holiday season. And, just when you thought you'd heard it all, here comes the idea of ..." Read More Celebrate the Holidays with the Gift of Time "Our economy is in a meltdown and the crisis in confidence couldn't have come at a worse time. You're likely facing tough buying decisions this holiday season. With the pressure of being stretched financially, the commercialism ..." Read More Communication How Politics Can Teach the Sandwich Generation a Lesson in Communication "Senator John Kerry said his remark, "If you don't study hard you get stuck in Iraq," was a joke gone awry. President George W. Bush was critical, commenting to the Associated Press that "it didn't sound like a joke to me." Read More Conflict Resolution for Boomers and the Media Culture "Have you noticed that, in our culture, slurs about gender, class, race and sex have become fairly commonplace and are often even seen as humorous by some? Howard Stern, Ann Coulter, Jesse Jackson and Bill O'Reilly, to name a few well known pundits, have been busy playing the 'can you top this' game."... Read More What the Baby Boomers Can Teach Paris Hilton "Are you tired of the celebrity driven circus revolving around Paris Hilton? Does the hotel heiress deserve to be behind bars for her flagrant disregard for the law? As a popular media figure, should she be responsible to set an example for the impressionable teenagers who emulate her?"... Read More What Sandwiched Boomers Can Learn from Tim Russert "AThere have been non-stop tributes to Tim Russert - from erudite political friends to strangers traveling long distances to pay their respects. He was the toughest interviewer in broadcast journalism and few had come even close ... Read More |
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